Of Love
The stage is more beholding to love, than the life of man. For as to the stage, love is ever matter of comedies, and now and then of tragedies; but in life it does much mischief; sometimes like a siren, sometimes like a fury.
You may observe, that amongst all the great and worthy persons (whereof the memory remaineth, either ancient or recent) there is not one, that has been transported to the mad degree of love; which shows that great spirits, and great business, do keep out this weak passion. You must except, nevertheless, Marcus Antonius, the half partner of the empire of Rome, and Claudius, the decimvir and law—giver; whereof the former was indeed a voluptuous man, and inordinate; but the latter was an austere and wine man; and therefore it seems (though rarely) that love can fine entrance, not only into an open heart, but also into a heart well fortified, if watch be not well kept.
It is poor saying of Epicurus, as if man, made for the contemplation of heaven, and all noble objects, should do nothing but kneel before little idol, and make himself a subject, though not o the mouth (as beasts are), yet of the eye; which was given him for higher purposes.
It is a strange thing, to note the excess of this passion, and how it braves the nature, and value of things, by this; that the speaking in a perpetual hyperbole, is comely in nothing but in love. Neither is it merely in the phrase; for whereas it has been well said, that the arch-flatterer, with whom all the petty flatterers have intelligence, is a man’s self; certainly the lover is more. For these was never proud man thought so absurdly well of himself, as the lover does of the person loved, and to be wise. Neither does this weakness appear to others only, and not to the party loves; but to the loved most of all, except the love be reciprode. For it is a true rule, that love is ever rewarded, either with the reciprode, or with an inward and secret contempt.
By how much the more, men ought to beware of this passion, which loss not only other things, but itself! As for the other losses, the poet’s relation doth well figure them: that he that preferred Helena, quitted the gifts of Juno and Pallas. For whosoever esteemeth too much of amorous affection, quitteth both riches and wisdom.
I know not how, but martial men are given to love: I think, it is but as they are given to wine; for perils commonly ask to be paid in pleasures.
There is in man’s nature, a secret inclination and motion, towards love of others, which if it be not spent upon some one or a few, doth naturally spread itself towards many, and maketh men become humane and charitable; as it is seen sometime in friars. Nuptial love maketh mankind; friendly love perfecteth it; but wanton love corrupteth, and embaseth it.